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Friday, January 22, 2016

Carpe Diem Haiku Special No. 193 Revise That Haiku ... a trip along memory lane


tanimizu ya / ishi mo uta yomu / yamazakura

sakura-slopes
in the valley-stream
even the stones make songs
Uejima Onitsura (1660-1738)

Visiting parents
Basalt pavement reflects street lights
Shunting yard’s music

mikazuki wa / soru zo samusa wa / saekaeru

the crescent moon
is bent back; the cold
is keen
Kobayashi Issa (1763-1827)

Moon’s sickle looming
No light enters the dark lake
Dead fish keep sleeping

umi kurete / kamo no koe / honoka ni shiroshi

darkening sea
the wild ducks’ cries
are dimly white
Matsuo Basho (1644-1694)

Only twinkling stars
No way to see the wild ducks
But they are noisy

http://chevrefeuillescarpediem.blogspot.de/2016/01/carpe-diem-special-193-revise-that.html


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6 comments:

  1. TournesolDansUnJardinJanuary 22, 2016 at 5:39 PM

    Oh my! you've selected such beautiful haiku and revised them keeping the activity first seen/felt ...I love that last one best because it seems so cheerful.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Bastet's Waka LibraryJanuary 22, 2016 at 9:23 PM

    What an interesting post .. nice "revisitations" :-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Adas AlcoveJanuary 22, 2016 at 9:54 PM

    Nice rewrites! You introduced me to some haiku I had not read before. :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. ChèvrefeuilleJanuary 22, 2016 at 10:16 PM

    Awesome series Lothar ...

    ReplyDelete
  5. RheumatologeJanuary 23, 2016 at 2:22 PM

    Thanks for the encouragement! :-)

    ReplyDelete
  6. JaniceJanuary 25, 2016 at 3:19 AM

    What a beautifully painted series in your haiku.

    ReplyDelete