Haiku for National Haiku Writing Month – September 2023 First Half

 

National Haiku Writing Month has been founded by the well known haiku poet Michael Dylan Welch. The goal is to write at least one haiku a day. National Haiku Writing Month is in its 13th year. [1] I enjoy writing to the prompts on Facebook. Here are some interesting links: [2]. The prompter for September 2023 is Mick Mezza, who had done so previously in March 2022.

雲邊雁斷胡天月，
隴上羊歸塞草煙。
蘇武廟。
溫庭筠。
Clouds in the sky and the moon above the Hun country,
The sheep graze on the ridge as he returns to his borderland fire.
Su Wu Temple
Wen Ting-jun [3]

reconciliation
the brook still murmurs
silent tears
~ tears

soft breeze
moving the buttercups
toddler's smile
~ smile

Staghorn knife
In the chest
Not to mention the blood
~ acrostichon and staghorn (and the Pet Shop Boys)

the waves are calming
good news
in the eye of the storm
~ good news

drifting in the dinghy
the turtles take deep breaths
we're holding our breaths
~ drifting

Michael Dylan Welch answered: “I'd try to give your haiku no more than two parts (this one has three). Perhaps this (I'm just trying to give the poem two parts)” and changed it to a much better haiku:

drifting in the dinghy . . .
we hold our breaths
as we pass the turtles

hot evening
the sound of Blue Öyster Cult
wind starting suddenly
~ oysters

at the porch
a drink and awkward silence
the moon's sickle is late
~ tension

at the old age home
a man introduces himself
Bond, James Bond
~ bond

everybody loves
mother's cheese cake
one slice remaining
~ slice

no gold coins
for the metal detector
only missing vibes
~ gold coins

nature's triumph
my garden is a jungle again
just watching it
~ triumph

... and now to something completely different: a barock poem, I remembered when reading the prompt:
http://www.zeno.org/Literatur/M/Kuhlmann,+Quirinus/Gedichte/Der+K%C3%BChlpsalter,+Band+1/Virdtes+Buch/Der+15.+(60.)+K%C3%BChlpsalm

too colorful
the wreathmaker's display
in my gloom
~ wreath

the snails on the lawn
reaching their goal
no laurel wreath, though
~ goal

longer nights
nocturnal fights
with the moon blindfolded
~ blindfold

Michael Dylan Welch answered: “The plurals here diminish the focus on a single here-and-now experience. You can experience only one night at a time. Perhaps revise with that in mind? Also, what do you mean by nocturnal "fights"? That feels too intellectualized (analysis rather than imagery). The rhyme feels distracting too.” So I changed my haiku to:

pitch dark
with the moon blindfolded
the cat starts hunting
~ blindfold

Links and Annotations:
[1] https://www.facebook.com/NaHaiWriMo  
National Haiku Writing Month
[2] „To help with haiku fundamentals, please have a look at "Becoming a Haiku Poet" at https://www.graceguts.com/essays/becoming-a-haiku-poet. And please review the "Haiku Checklist" at https://www.graceguts.com/essays/haiku-checklist.
[3] Wen Ting-jun (溫庭筠) is a poet of the Tang period. He lived from 812-870, although both dates are uncertain. The poem Su Wu Temple (rather Chapel) (蘇武廟), from which these two lines come, is included in the collection 300 Poems of the Tang Period (唐詩三百首), which was compiled in 1763. Wikipedia Chinese counts 311 poems, Wikipedia German counts “exactly” 310 poems, as does Wikipedia French, Wikipedia Japanese counts 313 poems, Wikipedia English counts 305 (“or more exactly 305”) and Wikipedia Vietnamese (“hay chính xác hơn là 305.”). The edition I used during my studies in Taiwan has 320 poems; I have good reasons to still using this edition.

.